Oh, hey there, East Coast! Looks like you had a bit of an earthquake, huh?
Don’t worry, I’m not gonna razz you about it. You’re ill-equipped for the tremors. A big quake would be way more catastrophic there than it would be here. You’re right to be a little jumpy about it.
Well, I’m no civil engineer so I can’t help you with your lack of seismic retrofitting. But I can help you calm your frayed nerves. So how about a fresh new track from the land of earthly rumblings, where the occasional 5.8 is practically de rigueur?
This one comes from Trackademicks, a hip-hop artist straight outta Alameda, California. His advice to you rattled East Coasters? Don’t panic. Chill.